2/3/06

can we talk about valentine's day?

The month of February is upon us and just as every year, I keep getting the question..."What are you and Pat doing for Valetine's Day?" Sorry if you've asked this...I'm not offended at all, but I do think I shock people at my response. I respond nicely and say "Pat and I don't celebrate Valetine's Day." Most women react in horror and saying "You're missing out!" But really I view it as a gain, not a loss.

My reasoning...well to completely honest, during my high school years I hated the holiday. I hated going to school and seeing all of the couples exchanging gifts and being all lovey-dovey. We had a carnation exchange at school in which they had different colors that represented different things. I'd be surrounded by people that had tons of red carnations for "love" and my friends, both girls and guys, would be kind and usually some of us would send yellow ones to each other for "friendship." I loved getting those but always kind of wished for a red one. Just never had a boyfriend throughout high school so that never happened. I dated but never had that "high school sweetheart" that everyone always talks about. Oh well!

So when I met Pat, and after 5 months of dating, Valentine's Day rolled around. We hadn't really discussed it and I think I made him some cookies because I felt like he'd be offended that I didn't do anything for him. He was really sweet and got me stuff too but then afterwards I told him that the next year...he didn't need to do that. By that time, Pat knew me pretty well and wasn't shocked at all by this. He just laughed it off and said "Well that's easy for me."

A couple years ago we decided we wanted to go out to dinner on Valentine's Day. Not to celebrate the holiday, but just to eat out cause we didn't feel like making anything. After attempting 3 places, forgetting that everyone else was out celebrating, we headed to my favorite place, Champps. I kept thinking it would be packed too, but not thinking about how it's a sports bar. We walked right in and it was empty. We got a seat right in front of the big screen, ate, had a couple of drinks and watched college basketball. I remember Pat saying to me "I love you...no other woman would be happy at a sports bar watching college bball."

So to the real point of my reasoning for disliking Valentine's Day. Number one, it makes everyone who's not part of a couple feel horrible. There's not holiday for single people! Secondly, every other couple is celebrating that same day...I think you should have your own special day. For instance, your anniversary or you just should celebrate on random days. I love the days when Pat brings home flowers (not roses though...that's another thing I can't stand! Has to be something different). And usually he'll find a funny card and write something sweet in it. That makes me feel loved...not him doing that on a day that everyone else does.

So...long story short, we don't celebrate Valentine's Day. I don't judge those that do, it's just what we've decided works for us. And we love those random days that we can let each other know we care!